Surviving Emotions by Ashley Bretting, M.S.
BLOG.ASHLEYBRETTING.COM
Anger Management Ventura County
Your Anger Style - Where Did It Come From?
If you find that you lack the proper skills to manage your own anger, it is NOT because you are stupid or a bad person. You never learned how to do anger in a healthy way.Our first teachers were our parents or caregivers, we learned how to "BE" in the world by watching and incorporating their coping skills, be it healthy or unhealthy that was not a factor.
Can you change this hard wiring, this learned behavior? The answer is a big resounding YES
Anger
Some Common Triggers
Road Rage
Relationship Issues
Work Envrionment
Internal Dialogue
INDIVIDUAL AND GROUPS AVAILABLE ~ FREE COURTESY ASSESSMENT AVAILABLE
(805) 204-7315
Affordable Therapeutic Support Groups, Individual Counseling & More
Welcome,
You have arrived at one of Ashley Brettings' blogs. Take a look around, write down the phone number, click a link and know that help is available if you or a loved one is struggling with an emotional issue or two.
If you do not see a specific issue or personal concern below, please be assured that you are not alone. Common concerns and other topics are frequently addressed in therapy, if you have a question feel free to call and ask.
If you are considering joining a therapeutic support group or seeking individual, couples or family counseling and live in the Ventura County area of California, you have come to the right place.
Ashleys' newest website with additional information can be found at:
http://www.805Therapy.comA few other sites:
http://www.ashleybretting.com
http://www.squidoo.com/psychotherapist
Bio: Ashley Bretting, M.S.
Ashley Bretting, M.S. Marriage & Family Therapist is a locally renowned pre-licensed psychotherapist and registered intern (#IMF 51514), as published in the Ventura County Star newspaper, Healthy Attitudes Magazine, Camarillo Acorn and a few on line communities.
Ashley works in collaboration with Morbrook Institute a nonprofit agency and the Camarillo Heath Care District (CHCD). September 2008, CHCD received an award for the exceptional counseling services that Ashley provides.
Clients typically come to Ashley by word of mouth referrals however, all referrals including self referrals are welcome. Clients enjoy her eclectic style with an emphasis in cognitive behavioral therapy, her wonderful compassion and insight regarding the human condition coupled with a delightful sense of humor that is upbeat, encouraging and truly engaging.
Ashley Bretting has a professional Master's of Science degree in Counseling Psychology with an emphasis in Marriage & Family Therapy from California State University Northridge, where she studied in a full time year round accelerated program.
Current work involves; facilitating therapeutic support groups, working with individuals, families & teens and conducting community presentations, as well as a provider of free disaster related counseling.
Previous types of work have included facilitating weekly play therapy groups in the El Rio School District and working with these children on an individual basis, facilitating groups at Aurora Vista Del Mar an acute psychiatric hospital in Ventura, California and provider of court mandated domestic violence offenders (both men & women) as well as, working with individuals and survivors of domestic violence, PTSD, crisis intervention, aging & long term care, couples counseling. Many times issues coexist, Ashley offers a wide range of support options.
Professionally affiliated with and a member of California Association of Marriage & Family Therapists, both local and state chapters.
Supervision provided by Lynn M. Jones, PhD
Lic# MFC021739 Clinical Supervisor
Ashley Bretting, M.S. MFTI
(805) 204-7315
http://www.ashleybretting.com
Obesessive Compulsive Disorder The Anxiety Connection
Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is most commonly characterized by intrusive, repetitive thoughts resulting in compulsive behaviors or rituals and mental acts that the person feels driven to perform, according to rules that must be applied rigidly, aimed at preventing some imagined dreaded event.
The disorder is often debilitating to the sufferer's (and his/her family's) quality of life. Also, the psychological self-awareness of the irrationality of the disorder can be painful. For people with severe OCD, it may take several hours a day to carry out the compulsive acts.
According to the current epidemiological data, OCD is the fourth most common mental disorder and OCD is considered "nearly as common as asthma and diabetes mellitus." In the United States, 1 in 50 adults have OCD. In severe cases, it affects a person's ability to function in everyday activities.
The underlying issue of OCD is anxiety. This is also true when it comes to panic attacks and is very treatable.
Explore and read more about anxiety, worry & panic at:
http://www.squidoo.com/MentalHealth4U
Anxiety & Depression Group
Wednesday afternoon anxiety & depression group in Camarillo takes place weekly 4:30 - 5:45 pm, this is a coed group. This group, like my other groups, is an open-ended, ongoing therapeutic support group for those interested in discovering healthier coping strategies and gaining relief through the use of tools and insight along with education. Affordable group fees, individual, family and couples appointments also available.
Offering a "one time" free 30 minute assessment ( a $65.00 savings ). Should you cancel or need to reschedule outside of a 24hour period, the regular fees apply.
Ashley Bretting, M.S.
Marriage & Family Therapist
Registered Intern #IMF51514
Supervised by Lynn M. Jones, Ph.D.
Lic # MFC021739
Morbrook Institute A non-profit agency
in collaboration with Camarillo Health Care District
(805) 204-7315
Today was my birthday
Today was my birthday
November 20th, today, is my birthday.
After a certain age, birthdays become just a reminder that we are aging - inching closer and closer to "The End"
I personally don't mind birthdays since I am not exclusively tied to the number(s). I was a late bloomer into Adulthood and finding my purpose in life. It took me years to discover what I had passions about, due in part to a wild and rocky childhood - young adulthood and recreating during these periods of my life, a negative sense of being and expending an enormous amount of energy into a circular self destructive lifestyle ranging from unhealthy relationships to self medicating and beyond.
When I found that I was tired of living my life the way I had been - I sought answers, used new tools and ways of being, thinking and doing and voila! O.k., it was difficult but it WAS doable. And I did it, I changed my life! ( You are invited to see what I do now at www.squidoo.com/psychotherapist or check out ways that I endorse the use of humor at www.squidoo.com/EverdayHumor )
In summary, with today being my birthday, I am grateful to be where I am today. All of the difficulties, challenges, self destructive behavior, unhealthy relationships, etc. have made me who I am today. And to think, there were many times when I viewed 'life' as a pretty lousy option.
Contributor's Note
There is hope! You, too can change your life if you're unable to bear the one you are living now. I know first hand this is possible. Hugs.
Ashley Bretting, M.S.
Marriage & Family Therapist
Registered Intern #IMF51514
Supervised by Lynn M. Jones, Ph.D.
Lic # MFC021739
Morbrook Institute A non-profit agency
in collaboration with Camarillo Health Care District
(805) 204-7315
www.ashleybretting.com
Commonly Shared Issues
Commonly Shared Issues That Cause Distress
TROUBLE SLEEPING?
Insomnia can become a chronic problem or a once in a while event. Not getting enough sleep can have devastating effects on one's cognitive (thinking/ reasoning) abilities as well as emotional and physical well being.
Sleep problems, unable to quiet your mind, depression and physical upset can often be attributed to uncontrolled anxiety. To have a quiet mind means everything to the individual suffering from sleepless nights.
Focusing on one thing helps calm the mind, it does take practice to train your mind to focus.
Breathing can be a good focal point, for example.
www.ashleybretting.com
ANXIETY - It has far reaching effects
The Anxiety Treadmill
One can be suffering with anxiety and not be fully aware of it.
HOW CAN THIS BE?
Do you or a loved one have a habit of counting, picking, checking and rechecking, always cleaning or struggle in social situations or driving, maybe leaving the house? What do your closets look like, extremely organized? Ever feel detached, like you're outside of yourself?
These can often be attributed to anxiety.
Have you ever been called a "worrier", struggle with insomnia or depression? There are also physical symptoms associated with anxiety.
Anxiety can reek havoc on our physical well being, weaken our immune systems, heart muscle and other vital organs.
It's not uncommon for individuals suffering from various forms of anxiety and even depression to turn to 'self medicating'. This may take the form of alcohol and or drugs, self destructive patterns of behavior and negative self talk.
To have a quiet mind, what might that be like and how can you achieve this - It is possible!
Focusing on one thing helps calm the mind, it does take practice to train your mind to focus. Breathing can be a good focal point.
For further help, support or guidance you may want to consider joining a support group, I facilitate several in the Ventura, CA area. Or you may contact your local social services agency.
Emotional Struggles: Depression, Anxiety, Anger & More
Life's journey holds many ups and downs, if you are struggling with your emotions and tired of feeling like you are out of control or can no longer cope there is help. It's not uncommon to lack perspective in your own situation, this is where you may truly benefit from an unbiased point of view, support & guidance.
Our old coping skills and styles fade as we grow older, in many instances simply becoming obsolete (what worked at age 9 may be inappropriate at age 49). As adults it is important to learn new coping strategies and incorporate new skills to deal with difficult emotions ( anger, depression, anxiety, … ), situations and even difficult people ( a boss, aging parent, roommate or partner). It's no one's fault that coping skills often need updating, it is just how things tend to evolve as we grow up and have new experiences.
If there are issues you would like to 'clean up', past hurts to be resolved, disappointments left to linger or maybe you're fostering unrealistic expectations of yourself or others - you now have the opportunity to address and put to rest your emotional baggage so that you can live the kind of life you want and deserve.
Every wonder why you do self destructive things? There are reasons and answers, as well as solutions and a way out.
Does depression, anxiety or anger interfere with your life & have you feeling unsettled and possibly insecure - these and many other issues can diminish our self esteem, encourage isolation and leave us feeling helpless.
There is hope!
Seasonal Affective Disorder
While Autumn (aka Fall) is my personally favorite time of year, it is often associated with SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder).
What is SAD? It is a reaction to the onset of shorter days and less available sunlight. This can be associated with a biological reaction often resulting in low mood, lethargy, depression. Also, geographic areas that experience few sunny days and rainy regions ( Seattle, Washington for example ) can result in this same disorder.
SELF ESTEEM
We need self-esteem because it is as important element to your psychological well-being.
Your level of self-esteem affects virtually everything you say, think and do. It affects how we see the world and you our place in it. It affects how others in the world see and treat us. It affects the choices you make - choices about what you will do with your life and with whom you will be involved. It affects your ability to both give and receive love. And it affects your ability to take action to change things that need to be changed.
If you have less than a sufficient amount of self-esteem, you may not be able to act in your own best interest. And if a person has no self-esteem at all, he will become overwhelmed, immobile and eventually will give up.
Components that directly relate to your self esteem
Anger
Self Confidence
Goal Setting
Changes in attitudes
Fear of success
Co-dependency
Self Talk
Wanting to do some work in this area? I'm ready when you are!
Ashley Bretting, M.S.
Marriage & Family Therapist
Registered Intern #IMF51514
Supervised by Lynn M. Jones, Ph.D.
Lic # MFC021739
Morbrook Institute A non-profit agency
in collaboration with Camarillo Health Care District
(805) 204-7315
www.ashleybretting.com
www.squidoo.com/psychotherapist
www.805Therapy.com
<a href="http://technorati.com/claim/uhmh2wmmbu" rel="me">Technorati Profile</a>
TROUBLE SLEEPING?
Insomnia can become a chronic problem or a once in a while event. Not getting enough sleep can have devastating effects on one's cognitive (thinking/ reasoning) abilities as well as emotional and physical well being.
Sleep problems, unable to quiet your mind, depression and physical upset can often be attributed to uncontrolled anxiety. To have a quiet mind means everything to the individual suffering from sleepless nights.
Focusing on one thing helps calm the mind, it does take practice to train your mind to focus.
Breathing can be a good focal point, for example.
www.ashleybretting.com
ANXIETY - It has far reaching effects
The Anxiety Treadmill
One can be suffering with anxiety and not be fully aware of it.
HOW CAN THIS BE?
Do you or a loved one have a habit of counting, picking, checking and rechecking, always cleaning or struggle in social situations or driving, maybe leaving the house? What do your closets look like, extremely organized? Ever feel detached, like you're outside of yourself?
These can often be attributed to anxiety.
Have you ever been called a "worrier", struggle with insomnia or depression? There are also physical symptoms associated with anxiety.
Anxiety can reek havoc on our physical well being, weaken our immune systems, heart muscle and other vital organs.
It's not uncommon for individuals suffering from various forms of anxiety and even depression to turn to 'self medicating'. This may take the form of alcohol and or drugs, self destructive patterns of behavior and negative self talk.
To have a quiet mind, what might that be like and how can you achieve this - It is possible!
Focusing on one thing helps calm the mind, it does take practice to train your mind to focus. Breathing can be a good focal point.
For further help, support or guidance you may want to consider joining a support group, I facilitate several in the Ventura, CA area. Or you may contact your local social services agency.
Emotional Struggles: Depression, Anxiety, Anger & More
Life's journey holds many ups and downs, if you are struggling with your emotions and tired of feeling like you are out of control or can no longer cope there is help. It's not uncommon to lack perspective in your own situation, this is where you may truly benefit from an unbiased point of view, support & guidance.
Our old coping skills and styles fade as we grow older, in many instances simply becoming obsolete (what worked at age 9 may be inappropriate at age 49). As adults it is important to learn new coping strategies and incorporate new skills to deal with difficult emotions ( anger, depression, anxiety, … ), situations and even difficult people ( a boss, aging parent, roommate or partner). It's no one's fault that coping skills often need updating, it is just how things tend to evolve as we grow up and have new experiences.
If there are issues you would like to 'clean up', past hurts to be resolved, disappointments left to linger or maybe you're fostering unrealistic expectations of yourself or others - you now have the opportunity to address and put to rest your emotional baggage so that you can live the kind of life you want and deserve.
Every wonder why you do self destructive things? There are reasons and answers, as well as solutions and a way out.
Does depression, anxiety or anger interfere with your life & have you feeling unsettled and possibly insecure - these and many other issues can diminish our self esteem, encourage isolation and leave us feeling helpless.
There is hope!
Seasonal Affective Disorder
While Autumn (aka Fall) is my personally favorite time of year, it is often associated with SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder).
What is SAD? It is a reaction to the onset of shorter days and less available sunlight. This can be associated with a biological reaction often resulting in low mood, lethargy, depression. Also, geographic areas that experience few sunny days and rainy regions ( Seattle, Washington for example ) can result in this same disorder.
SELF ESTEEM
We need self-esteem because it is as important element to your psychological well-being.
Your level of self-esteem affects virtually everything you say, think and do. It affects how we see the world and you our place in it. It affects how others in the world see and treat us. It affects the choices you make - choices about what you will do with your life and with whom you will be involved. It affects your ability to both give and receive love. And it affects your ability to take action to change things that need to be changed.
If you have less than a sufficient amount of self-esteem, you may not be able to act in your own best interest. And if a person has no self-esteem at all, he will become overwhelmed, immobile and eventually will give up.
Components that directly relate to your self esteem
Anger
Self Confidence
Goal Setting
Changes in attitudes
Fear of success
Co-dependency
Self Talk
Wanting to do some work in this area? I'm ready when you are!
Ashley Bretting, M.S.
Marriage & Family Therapist
Registered Intern #IMF51514
Supervised by Lynn M. Jones, Ph.D.
Lic # MFC021739
Morbrook Institute A non-profit agency
in collaboration with Camarillo Health Care District
(805) 204-7315
www.ashleybretting.com
www.squidoo.com/psychotherapist
www.805Therapy.com
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Free Counseling to those affecting by Metrolink Accident
To all those affected by the recent Metrolink accident in Chatsworth, CA. I am providing 6 Free Counseling sessions. Offices located in Camarillo, CA - Please mention this site to take advantage of this limited offer.
In addition to the above services, I facilitate therapeutic support groups, individual counseling and am available for group presentations. Affordable fees and some sliding scale opportunities for those who qualify. Serving Ventura County Individuals, Couples, Teens, Seniors facing a variety of life issues.
Offices in Camarillo and Ventura
Ashley Bretting, M.S.
Marriage & Family Therapist
Registered Intern #IMF51514
Supervised by Lynn M. Jones, Ph.D.
Lic # MFC021739
Morbrook Institute A non-profit agency
in collaboration with Camarillo Health Care District
Cell: (805) 204-7315
Office: (805) 484-7868 Ext. 8#
www.ashleybretting.com
www.squidoo.com/psychotherapist
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